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The Religion of Boosh
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Below are the 10 most recent journal entries recorded in The Gospel According to Boosh's LiveJournal:

Thursday, May 4th, 2006
2:21 am
A bit of Boosh slash now and then is cherished by the wisest men...

Thought I'd post it here as well (we must have our perfect symmetry after all my dear banshee!), just for shits and giggles and whatnot.

Is it bad that we spend our time writing stories about men discovering they're gay...?!

Oh the wondrous joys of unemployment!

Current Mood: Booshtastic
Monday, April 10th, 2006
5:37 pm
Truth or Dare Part Two
Title: Truth or Dare Part Two: The Morning After
Author: raving banshee
Pairing: Howard and Vince
Summary: Its all one big blur of forbidden kisses and bovril hoops as Howard and Vince prepare for their next gig and tackle their true feelings!
Rating: bit more angsty with some old men thrown in!

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Saturday, April 8th, 2006
12:22 pm
Boosh loose in Brum!
Went to see The Boosh last night, oh my god! One of the higlights of my life so far. At one point Noel ran past us and was so close I could see the sweat on his brow! Ingenious new songs and moments of nudity and Rich is just a god! I dressed up as Vince in my pink cat suit, hardly anyone else dressed up so I felt well glam. My mate went as Rubella the goth girl! Went to see Robots in Disguise after, my ears are still ringing. The boosh guys didnt show up but never mind, it was still an awesome night of Booshy goodness! Thank the god lord for The Mighty Boosh!
Friday, April 7th, 2006
2:16 pm
Me and Hannah are going to see the boosh tonight at Brum NIA,I'm so excited im off my tits! We're going to stake out backstage and bestow our love poems on them! Hannahs going as a Ebola/Anthrax goth girl, im wearing my purple cat suit and pink cowboy hat and going as Vince, i figure he'll tak one look at me,ill remind him of himself and he'll want a piece of my ass! Ths boosh is loose in Brum,thank the good lord!
Tuesday, April 4th, 2006
2:45 pm
Thought this was relevant if not, feel free to delete...

"Due to unforeseen filming commitments, THE MIGHTY BOOSH show at the The Brighton Centre on Tuesday 11th April, has been cancelled. Ticket holders can obtain a full refund at the point of sale. Additional tickets are now on sale for THE MIGHTY BOOSH show at The Brighton Centre on Sunday 9th April. By way of apology for any inconvenience caused, all those who bought tickets for the Tuesday night show will be offered a discounted presale for when THE MIGHTY BOOSH next visit THE BRIGHTON CENTRE."

X-Posted all over the shop...!
Tuesday, March 28th, 2006
3:18 pm
the legend of old gregg.....
This is what happens when you've been unemployed too long and are obsessed with the boosh, enjoy and add!

some say.....he pisses pure vimto!

some say he fought off a whole clan of grizzly bears armed only with a crab stick!

some say he was the original lead singer of Status Quo

some say hes composed entirley of telephone manuals!

some say he licked Drew Barrymoores foot and went mad!

some say hes the bastard child of Germaine Greer and a ginat squid!

some say watching syncronised swimming gives him a hard on!

some say he tickled Prince Charles' chin while he was sleeping!

some say he liked the godfather trilogy though found part two rather boring in places!

some say he balanced a lemon on his foot and cried!

some say hes the best ballroom dancer the world has ever seen!

some say he used to be Mick Hucknells best friend but they had a falling out!

some say he ate a whole bag of flour and went on a journey in a small car!

some say he read Women In lOve and his head exploded!

some say hes just Noel Fielding in a tutu but we dont belive it!

some say his tesco value club card unlocks the secrets of the universe!

some say he licks cats inappropriatly!

some say hes the chairman of the Michael Jackson fan club!
Tuesday, March 21st, 2006
4:07 pm
love ode to Vince/Noel, suck on my booshy goodness!
Ode to the Camden Leisure Pirate of my heart!

Vince Noir,
Rock an Roll star,
When first my eyes gazed upon your mighty bonce,
My heart thudded like a badger being bludgeoned
By an angel of lust,
With a diamond encrusted spanner!

Your eyes like stars from a distant planet,
Where Mod aliens dance fabulous tangos in your honour.
Your silken scarves and studded belts!
Your stylish cowboy boots make my backbone jellify,
Dribbling down my legs,
Like custard over a passion pudding.
I’m off my tits at the thought of your off-cuts!

Gosh darn it!
You’re a bit lovely.
Your graceful hands dispensing millet to Gods great creatures,
With an affectionate wonder,
Innocent and true,
Strutting in your poncho,
Androgynous demi-god,
With your sexy ju ju!
Jagger tosses in his sweat soaked sheets at night,
Wishing he was you!

I imagine us floating on a giant crisp packet to the moon,
And contemplating why bats only come out at night when their blind anyway,
Whilst eating red jelly tots and counting cyber midgets under a meteor shower,
“Starman” playing in the background.
As I run my fingers through your beautiful barnet,
Quivering with excitement,
And run my fingers though your gorgeous god-like locks,
Quivering with anticipation,
And run my fingers through your glittering mane,
Dribbling with desire…
Well maybe not dribbling,
That congers up thoughts of demented old ladies,
And I’m actually quite young and nubile,
But to be fair I am a bit demented,
I’ve got sand from Jim Morrison’s grave in a pot by my bed for one thing,
But that’s another story for another time!

For now,
Of mighty King of the Mods,
I shall serenade your gargantuan (I love that word, it makes me a bit horny) grin,
And childlike artistry,
And unmatched wit,
Pretty lady!
Are we to be trapped together in a box by a cockney nut job?
One can only hope!

Paint my butt checks with your psychedelic scribbles,
Toss me your used sweet wrappers,
And I’ll treasure them as I would a small big eyed rabbit.
I have developed an unnerving habit,
Of pause and zoom,
Watching you smile in slow motion,
My love/lust/slight obsession,
Bigger than a really big ocean.

I do a little dance,
Under the brightest sombrero wearing star,
Vince Noir,
Vince Noir,
Rolling off the tongue like…

This is one of those poems in progress where you can make up your own endings.

I love you have my babies!
Monday, March 20th, 2006
5:14 pm
Some boosh slash
Fiction of a diseased mind! Enjoy!

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Friday, March 17th, 2006
5:28 pm
Ode To the Jazz Maverick of My Heart...
I was afraid that I'd be locked up for this, but I know the madness is accepted here, with you mrspellam :D

Here it is, an ode to my Howard. If only...

Howard Moon
O Howard Moon
With your face like a pink balloon

A jazz-fusion maverick
That just needs a break
Britain's leading cream poet
Would kill for a date
With Gideon.

I'd love to make you cups of tea
Read the papers, make fun of the Queen,
We'd laugh at each others' terrible jokes,
My mum would think you're a jolly nice bloke

I'd knit you a sweater for something to do
Whilst you're off on adventures with Vince and Naboo
And when you returned, I'd have made us some tea,
Bangers and mash, with gravy and peas.

And we'd listen to jazz, and remember a time
When everybody spoke in rhyme
And scat men danced, and jazz was king
Before computers, and iPods, and... shit...

O Howard, my moonbeam
With your eyes of sad coal,
Let us elope, and to the forests we'll go!
We'll get with the bracken, and move with the moss,
Forget Mrs. Gideon!
It's her tragic loss!
We'll talk of trumpets and bookmarks into the night
'Til our eyelids are heavy, and we curl up tight,
And Rudi Van Disarzio lulls us to sleep,
We followed the puffin
Now we'll never leave...

Yes that's right, I am cool. More Boosh poetry! I demand it!

Current Mood: creative
Thursday, March 16th, 2006
3:26 pm
A sermon in the way of Booshness
Behold all ye who be lost and confused,
There is hope if the way of the Boosh,
Tis no ordinary religion nay,
Though it be wondrous and mighty,
There be no singing of dull and dreary hymns,
There be no incessant drinking of tepid tea and munching of cheap biscuits,
And mindlessly boring flower arrangements,
This religion be full of strange creatures, jazz mavericks and the most fabulous of haircuts,
Behold the all encompassing, animal loving (though not in a bestiality sense) glam-rock-jump-suit laden grandeur of The Mighty Boosh!
Your king is no ordinary king,
He ahs no white robes to hide his enticing androgynous frame,
No beard to disguise his chiselled chin,
He is the endlessly stylish,
Most exquisite,
Ragamuffin little man King of The Mods!
There be no bread and fishes here,
In his infinite wisdom,
He gives you the funk!
The hula hoops of Bovril!
And off cuts that would make angels weep!
Worship and adore his root boosted locks and scarf’s of silk and poncho of joy!
And thou shalt dwell in the light of the Midnight Barber for all eternity!
His father is no ordinary father,
He is a humble Satre reading handsome god,
Who bestows his wisdom in the form of freestyle be-bop,
And rains down his infinite intellectualism with the grace of a veteran actor,
Behold his sensitive eyes,
His heavenly singing voice,
His manly torso,
And worship at eh psychedelic shrine of Papa Moon.

Commandments of the Boosh

Thou shalt wear ponchos and sombreros all day every day and be off thy tits on happiness

Thou shalt worship the off cuts of the mighty King of the Mods and treasure them and rub them over thy naked self, dribbling with pleasure!

Thou shalt never give a lift to a cockney with a box, twill always end bad!

Thou shalt listen to free style jazz funk and electro pop, for that is the only true music

Thou shalt have a cool yet simple dance routine for every surreal encounter

Add a commandment and lets get the world off its tits on Booshness!

Current Mood: crazy
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